It is a well accepted fact that while men are
more likely to be unfaithful, women are also
capable of the same, depending on the
situation.
Most men would usually cite reasons such
as boredom, opportunity, temptation, etc,
as what pushed them to adultery, but
women, being the more emotional gender,
often state different reasons.
In a society like ours, women are not very
forthcoming about sex-related issues much
less open up about infidelity, but Naij.com
has been able to gather some reactions
from a few Nigerian women under
conditions of anonymity.
Names have been changed to protect the
identity of the subjects.
1. Loneliness:
“My husband works in the airline industry
and this means he travels very often.
Sometimes we spend as long as 6 months
apart. I did not actually plan and set out to
be unfaithful but it was getting very difficult
and lonely. I recently started an affair with a
co-worker and we get together about once
a week.”
Deborah* 36
2. Excitement:
“Before I got married, 2 years ago, I was
the fun, party girl everyone loved to hang
out with. Since being married, my life has
become quite dull. Two weeks ago, I met a
very good-looking guy on social media and
he made me feel all the excitement that I
have missed. I have only been intimate with
him once and I do not intend to make this a
regular affair.”
Nike* 26
3. Payback:
“My husband and I have been married for a
little over 25 years and in that time, my
husband has been the consummate bed-
hopper. He has slept with everything from
maids to executives. Now, I am done
raising my kids and I seem to have a little
extra time on my hands. I started dating an
old friend who also happens to be married.
I love my husband but it has been great to
enjoy some of the pleasure he has afforded
himself all these years.”
Ogechi* 45
4. Sex Drive:
“My husband and I have been married for
almost 5 years, and I can count the number
of times we have been intimate. He hardly
initiates sex and sometimes, when I do, he
gets very angry and pushes me away
aggressively. He even sometimes resorts to
calling me names. It has been months since
the last time he and I had sex. Last year, I
met a guy at a wedding. We both started
hanging out as friends but soon after, our
conversation became more sexual and it
was only a matter of time until things got
physical.”
Cynthia* 31
5. The Ex-factor:
“Before my husband and I got married
about 6 years ago, I had a boyfriend who I
really wanted to settle down with. We were
from separate tribes and our families did
not approve of our relationship. Eventually,
I met and married my husband, who my
parents loved. I still have feelings for my ex,
who is still single. He and I are still very
close. We talk every day. I open up to him
and tell him everything going on in my life.
Sometimes, I pay him a visit and let him
comfort me when I am down. We have
been intimate from time to time and
whenever I am with him, I feel more loved
and cared for than I ever felt with my own
husband. I cannot help it.”
Grace* 33
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