» "My 14-Year-Old Sister Made Shocking Revelations, How Can I Manage The Situation?" «

Hello parents and friends,
I used another user name.....I have a 14 yr old only sis who
is getting out of hand. My parents are quite aged(mom -
close to 60, dad - above 70 and challenged health-wise).
Mom and sis are the only ones taking care of him. My
brother serving while I work far from home. I go home once
or twice in a month as I also do some casual jobs apart
from my job during the weekends to make ends meet. P.S:
I am the first girl and first born, so the need to hustle as I
send money home and all. I am in mid 20s.
Each time I go home, I make sure I educate/groom my
younger sis on how to behave. I educate her on sex
education, composture as a woman, what and what-nots. I
inquire about her academics, spiritual life, I ask about her
friends and I know a few of them. I try my possible best to
talk to her and obviously she tells me only what she feels I
should know. I even give her pocket money every month
#1000 just to encourage her and know I care about her
which I belive she understands.
Last weekend when I went home, I noticed the way she
spoke to my mom and I corrected her. I also noticed she
painted her nails and I have corrected her on this issue for
a while. I have advised her severally and given her strong
reasons why she should not indulge in such yet. I
understand what puberty means as I am a peer educator.
My mom resorted to beating her when she goes wrong but
I explained to my mom not to do that all the time cos she
is in her puberty stage, she is prone to misbehaving. I
advised she should talk to her which she adhered to but
my sis has refused to listen. On getting home this
weekend, I was infuriated when I saw her painted nails. I
had to choice than to smack her. I asked her why she has
refused to obey my instructions despite all advice and
corrections, she didnt say anthing.
My neighbor came around and also advised her to stop
such act. Just today, while at work, my mom chatted with
me that she saw a diary my sister wrote confessing that
she hates her parents because last year they refused to
allow her go to Deeper life camp. Pls note that we are not
members of that church but over the years, my mom has
always allowed her go for their youth camp because its not
far from us and its within the area but last year, dad had
attack and mom sells egg which she distrubutes and she
needed my sister to assist her,hence, her refusal. My
sister told me about it and I explained to her that mom
needs her more that period, and I assured her she would
go this year.
Alas, mom just saw it in her diary today where she stated
that she hates her parents because they refused her and
for some silly reasons which bores down to correcting her.
She also mentioned that she has a boyfriend but she
doesnt like the boy because he refused to give her money.
Please note that, she takes #70 to school each day plus
food. Even in our financial situation, my mom tries her best
to satisfy her children. My sister even saves the money I
send to her and buy meaningful things with it. She also
wrote in her diary where mom beat and corrects herand
she doesnt like it.
Infact, I just jokingly waved the whole thing when my mom
told me in tears today because I dont want to worsen the
whole thing. I told her I also had diaries where I wrote all
sorts about disliking my parents and my brother when I
was at her age because I thought they loved my brother
more. I even thought she wasnt my mom because of the
whole discipline thing which is quite true. Not untill I
became matured that I saw that she actually loved me
and her training has helped me troughout life even in tough
situations till date...you cant spend an hour with me
without liking me ....no, my mom tried
To cut the long story short, pls how do I manage this
situation because I dont want this to cause a burden to my
mom. My dad must not even hear. I just had to appease
her that it is normal for teenagers to think that way and all
and she shouldnt create a big deal over it. I advised that
she should have a heart to heart talk with my sis. I will be
going home this weekend, pls how do I get my sister to
realise that we love her and we care about her alot, how do
I explain to her that shes just been disciplined and nothing
more... oro yi su mi..