20-year-old Jazzmyne Holden who accused her former foster father, Gary Gibson, 65, of raping her when she was 10 and under his care, broke down on the Dr Phil show as she confronted him about what he allegedly did to her as a child.
Gary Gibson, a Christian ex-teacher admits that he is a paedophile but he refers to himself as a 'virtuous paedophile' because, according to him, he has never raped little girls though he is sexually attracted to them. Gary was forced to reveal that he is a paedophile three years after Holden stopped being under his care.
During that period, Holden accused him of having raped her leading to Gary being investigated by police. At this point, he had to come clean with his wife, Tabitha Gibson, whom he married in 2005 after he and his former wife divorced.
He told her:
"I didn't do it, but this is where I'm at... I'm attracted to kids."
On Dr Phil show, Holden revealed that she remember being raped by Gary. Gary denied this, saying that Holden was only imagining things and Gary's wife, Tabitha, took her husband's side.
She said to Holden:
"I'm sorry you're struggling Jazzmyne. You know I care a lot about you... I believe what Gary said
Tabitha's words led Holden to cry some more as she assured the audience that she was not making things up and had indeed been raped.
Holden, who spent just three months with the Gibsons before she and her sibling were removed by Child Protection Services, first revealed that she was raped a year after leaving Gary's home and moving in with new foster parents. She alleged that it was then that she began to remember the repressed abuse.
According to her, she was about 11 or 12 and was making soup when she spilt hot soup all over her legs and crotch, the pain brought back memories. She told her new mum about it and was taken to the hospital where the doctor confirmed she had been raped at some point in her life.
Holden claims that she and her sister were removed from Gary's home due to reports that Gary had touched little girls in his care, but Gary says that is not the case, that the children were removed because one of his foster kids made up a story that he left them in the woods alone.
Though Gary has children and grandchildren of his own, he adopted foster kids because, according to him, his grandchildren don't visit often. He disclosed that the first time he changed his daughter's diapers he worried if he might touch her.
"The first time I remember changing my daughter’s diaper I thought, "Am I going to touch her" or something, but I made the decision right there that was not going to happen."
At some point during the interview, Dr Phil asked Gary if he would take a polygraph to prove his innocence and Gary said he would have, that he wanted to but his lawyers advised him not to.
Gary's family has a history of incestual child abuse. His grandfather raped his mother and at least one of his sisters, his father raped his sisters, his grandmother was known to have little boys over and did 'things' with them. Gary reveals he has touched his younger female cousins too but at that time he was a child himself and that since becoming an adult he made a decision not to.
Read Gary's account:
"My grandfather sexually abused my mother and I think at least one of his sisters, and my father's mom was known on the streets to be one that invited the little boys into her house and did things with them.
So, I think, she is a pedophile. I know for a fact my father sexually abused several of my sisters – nearly all of them.
Is pedophilia inherited? I don't know, but whatever inheritance I got from my ancestors I think was initialized by experiences I had as a young person.
When I was six, my two older sisters taught me to play 'go to sleep'. My understanding was I was to get them to take their panties off and get them ready to sleep. I don't think it was abuse, but it left me with the impression that little girls want to be touched.
When I was about 12, I spent a summer with my cousins and there were some sexual games that went on there… both of these girls were five years younger. I was 12, I think one of them was seven and one of them was five.
Basically, their brother taught me to play 'doctor' with them. When I got home, one of my sisters told me she would beat me up if I ever did anything like that again.
I knew that it was wrong, but frankly in the fifties, every male I knew was sexually attracted to children and little girls. Is that true or not, I don't know, but I've talked to hundreds of other people who had the same experience. It seemed very normal to me.
I had never called myself a pedophile, but for more than 50 years I have been sexually attracted to little girls. I choose not to act on it. It was pretty easy for me to pretend to be like a regular normal adult male, and I got married and for 25 years my first marriage went along pretty normally.
I knew I was attracted to little girls, I was always a little close, maybe I hugged them too tight, or did some things I shouldn't have done, but I never penetrated a child, never – what I would call – had sex with a child.
I choose not to do that, but I struggle with it. There was no one to talk to about it, I was totally alone.
And so then I was single again in the late-nineties, in 1997 and 1999 I spent some time out in the South Pacific, lots of little girls running around naked there.
I struggled with it and I came back and talked to a counselor and started to get my act together while I was single, and when I told her she abandoned me. I was more at risk during that time than I probably ever have been, because I felt so alone, and like a ticking time bomb.
But life went on, and Tabitha and I got married. We met on Christian Singles dating, we built a log cabin with some rooms upstairs so our grandchildren can come and visit us – I have three children, 10 grandchildren – and never had any problems with them.
The first time I remember changing my daughter's diaper I thought, 'Am I going to touch her' or something, but I made the decision right there that was not going to happen.
Now we decided to have foster children. Well, why didn't I tell my wife I struggled with it? I didn't feel like coming out, so we had foster children. Things went pretty well… but three years after, they left. They left for other reasons – we moved onto other things, the foster girl developed false memories.
Now you tell me, I mean society says children never lie about sexual abuse. But here the Oregon State Police show up at our door one day and say, 'Do you know why I'm here?' They proceeded to tell me this girl disclosed that I lay on the bed naked with her. That never happened, and then they said: 'Well, she said you put your penis inside of her.' I said that never happened, and they asked me to do a polygraph.
So I contacted a lawyer, this was like two days before Christmas 2010, the attorney said don't do the polygraph.
As a result of that experience, I came out to Tabitha. I told her I didn't do it, but this is where I'm at.
That I'm attracted to kids. She then encouraged me to become a licensed professional counselor. And so I promptly went online, and went to Walden University – a Master's Degree in Mental Health Counselling and almost completed it, when I was at a residency in Portland, and the students got together with the instructor.
He said he wanted us to share something we are dealing with, and when I was my turn I said that they would reject me if I shared what I was dealing with. But then a girl said they wouldn't reject me, so I told them I'm sexually attracted to children and they all rejected me.
They then took me in before the administrative council and they said I had to leave the premises immediately. So I left, they told me I could complete the degree by doing some 'reeducation programs' to reprogram my mind, but then they backed out on that and dismissed me from the university.
That's my story. That's why I have a personal interest in helping people."
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